Although it is not as worldly-sophisticated as KL, Kampar is so special, for me. I just need to remember Kampar to make me smile and sigh with relief. But, what is so extraordinary about this place that glues my attention, that seduces my imagination over and over, that continuously allures me to come back again? I don’t have the definite answers. Maybe a brief glimpse into the past would give some clues.


Precious Gold

Situated in Kinta Valley, the word Kampar was derived from the Cantonese word kam pao, which means Precious Gold (Linguistically, it almost resembles my hometown, Pasir Mas – the Golden Sand). This 110-year-old town was once a famous tin mining place. While Jimi and I are humming our favourite songs in his car, I remember looking curiously at those abandoned mines, which could be commercialized into magnificent lakes, spread along the outskirts of Kampar.

The majority of the town’s population is of Chinese descent, which explains the gigantic graveyard located nearby the town. From the Bandar Baru Kampar, one could see the green hills where hundreds, or maybe thousands, of tombs are lining up. The extension of the cemetery is in progress. And this particular sight captures my attention. It is really creepy that when I think of Kampar, I always remember this breathtaking, widely-spread Chinese cemetery serenely located on the vast slope of hills (what a weird perspective, huh?). It was so beautifully-organised that I funnily refused to accept the fact that it was actually a resting place where the great-great Chinese ancestors were peacefully treasured. It was a sight of a perfect heavan, unlike Muslim cemetery located nearby, which triggers the scary images of Pontianak Harum Sundal Malam or Waris Jari Hantu. (Oh, what a blasphemous thought, Cekmi!)


And who says Kampar is underdeveloped? With the establishment of a new campus of University Tunku Abdul Rahman, Kampar is surely progressing very rapidly. This is evident in the swift development in its Bandar Baru where a starred Grand Kampar Hotel is proudly located. When I discovered this hotel, I had to readjust my mind-setting about Kampar. I simply couldn’t fathom its very existence, until I remember that this town is moving into a new direction of development. When Komuter, another transportation project, is completed very soon, I could easily vanish myself from KL to Kampar, where the station is situated just at the back of Jimi’s house. Pretty strategic, huh?

Looking at these positive physical changes, I have even considered Kampar as one of the potential places for me to settle down. What’s more, this town used to be the residence of famous figures - Datin Paduka Seri Endon Mahmood, late wife of Pak Lah, Eric Moo, a Taiwan-based singer, and Mark Chang, the founder of Jobstreet.com. Well, I could be the next proud resident of Kampar – Dato’ Cekmi, the founder of Kamparia Megamall. hehe.


But what are the real reasons for my preference towards Kampar as compared to other more happening towns in Malaysia?

One thing for sure, Jimi is surviving there, alive and happy. And I would always look forward to seeing Jimi, because meeting him would mean allowing some eccentric ways to accomplish my on-going cravings for peace and happiness, which I couldn’t possibly attain in a cruel KL, which is frustratingly void of love and care. And Jimi is such a guru of life. Meeting him in person is like expanding the contents of the SMSes that have been continuously exchanged between us for years.

With this in mind, Kampar has become the dreamland in my selfish journey for self-rediscovery and inspiration. It is undoubtedly a sanctuary for my grieving soul and torn spirit. It completes me. And it will always be. Because this is my American Dream.

Kampar Dream.

“Can I just pop up to your house for two days? Just wanna spend some time with you – chitchat, watch great movies, or to the very least, just share the silence,” I texted Jimi recently. When I finally went there, Jimi and I did exactly what I had in mind. Chitchat. Movies. Silence.

But, Jimi has a lot more in store for me. He surprises me in many delightful ways. Because he is the 7-eleven of entertainment paraphernalia.



Jimi: The Guru of Life

1. Movie Guardian

I always desire to watch those astounding movies thoroughly reviewed by Jimi in his blog. His collections are utterly amazing. Sitting excitedly in his bedroom, I will be honoured and thrilled to select some of the great movies and watch them consecutively. While I am watching the movies attentively and struggling to understand them, Jimi is again absorbing the details of the movies as if it was the first time that he watched them. His appreciation of the philosophy of movies always awes me. I wish I could interpret, learn and be inspired by the movies as saintly as Jimi could.

2. God of Retro

Getting a royal access to his godly collections of music, from the 1980s up to the nines, makes me one of the luckiest men on earth. You won’t believe me until you experience it with your own senses what he’s got in store. I don’t even know that those songs ever exist. After getting hundreds of free songs of all times, what else do I need to heal my soul? And listening to these songs in Jimi’s car is one way to appreciate the moments of togetherness. Ah, I am on the cloud nine.

3. Books! Books! Books!

Jimi is an avid reader, just like me. We would go to a calm place – waterfall, beaches, etc, - and read our own books silently. We don’t need to talk much to understand that we both enjoy each others’ company, even in deepest silence! In any moment, we could be drowning into deepest imagination and intelligence. Don’t be scared readers. We are still humans. Freak humans. Ha ha.

And with all these in mind, I had accumulated tones of everlasting and fond memories of Kampar, the very place where Jimi and his dearest family reside. The truth is, ever since Jimi and I found our separate ways after graduation, I have been to his house regularly that I have lost count already. And my friends would not stop teasing me on my exclusive choice of vacation. They are usually very curious about my personal retreat.

“Why did you spend your holidays in Kampar? You should go back to Pasir Mas, your own hometown!”
“Come on Cekmi, Kampar is nothing. No disco. No life. KL is more fun!”
“Were you having an affair in Kampar?”
“Kampar? Why on earth, Cekmi?”

Yes, why Kampar?

It is not easy to graduate with flying colours, is it?

When I started my master’s degree program on a part-time basis in November 2003, I had not anticipated that the journey would be a long and tough one. It indeed required high self-motivation, self-discipline and personal sacrifice to master the art of juggling between excessive workload in the office and the demanding nature of the master’s study. First and foremost, I had to release some of the administrative positions in the college in order to concentrate on my studies (so long to all the privileges and luxuries I had previously enjoyed). Second, I had to lower my status as a post-graduate student by attending, not one but, six under-graduate classes. Since my first degree was in Political Science, I had to complete these under-graduate subjects as a basic requirement to qualify me for a current program in TESL. It was a weird environment, learning together with those freshmen, and going through all the hassles as a sophomore (luckily they hardly noticed my humble existence, thanks to my boyish character).

The field of the study was my own choice, not my family’s nor brother’s (Thank God!). It was fun at the beginning. In fact, learning how to teach English as a second language and, at the same time, teaching English to my students at the college were extremely exciting. Learning was so rewarding that I managed to score a flat CGPA of 4.000 during the first semester of my post-graduate studies. I had never been so proud of myself. What a way to start!

Completing undergraduate subjects was easy, especially Phonetics and Phonology, my favorite subject. It was my pleasure sitting together with those eager and creative students. At times, I was intellectually amused that they learned those subjects at their early age. Seeing these language students learning literature made me even more jealous since I never had a chance to learn it formally during my fresh days (I once vowed to myself to register for a literature course one day).

After passing these under-graduate subjects, I had to complete ten master subjects, the real post-graduate subjects. It was a completely new direction for me since I was not an English graduate. Despite all the troubles, learning English at a higher level was academically and linguistically fulfilling. The lecturers and classmates were fun and helpful. We were like a family. I looked forward to going to afternoon classes. It was thrilling to find myself teaching English in the morning and learning English in the afternoon. What a bizarre combination! And I managed to complete all the subjects and coursework rather gracefully in 2005, with a final CGPA of 3.566. Alhamdulillah.

But that’s not all. Here comes the hardest part of my study – the thesis writing,

As a matter of fact, I could have avoided writing a thesis had I opted to a Comprehensive Examination. However, based on various professors’ (and my brother’s!) professional recommendations, I chose a tougher option - writing. They strongly claimed that research writing would prove that I was a true academician who would secure a first-class place in a university. Luckily, it seemed fit to my life plan. Therefore, I followed their advice, not knowing what price that I had to pay afterwards. Because the subsequent consequences were almost unbearable.

To begin with, thesis writing has cost me a lot of physical and mental energy. I was slowly drained by the powerful force it demanded from me. Frankly, it took me one year and a half just to complete a research proposal. The final draft sent to my supervisor was the eighth draft! Yes, my supervisor has been tediously fussy. She meticulously checked into every single detail of the proposal. But in some aspects, she was not that demanding actually. Knowing that I was working, she let me do my research work independently. Most of the time, I took my own sweet time finishing the thesis only later to realize that time had flown so rapidly. There were times when I couldn’t discipline myself anymore. Studying sometimes seemed like a big burden that I wished I didn’t start it at all in the first place. I was lost in the middle of urban enjoyment and metropolitan disillusions.

I experienced a terrible angst when I was at the university’s 22nd Convocation Ceremony last year. When I saw my own classmates graduating with honours, I felt a strong pang of envy and panic, and I saw myself leaping to a complete doom. It was supposed to be my graduation day too, I was telling myself repetitiously. What happened to me? I should be there too, walking on the stage, receiving scroll, receiving feel-good greetings from family and friends. But there I was, strolling lazily on the walks of disaster, stranded among the academic fools. Truly, I was damn jealous of those graduates, that I felt like I could take out a gun, pull a trigger and kill them randomly. Like a giant slap onto my face, it was dawned to me that I had to do something for my abandoned study.

I thereafter became more determined to take my study more seriously when thinking of those stuffs that I had dreamed of, that I would potentially achieve after getting my master’s degree – better career, better monetary returns, better life! I am even considering to join my brother’s university in Sabah (Things are ironically good between my brother and I recently). Alternatively, I would join any public university, get a decent academic position with a better pay, get a good bondage agreement, and apply for a fulltime Ph.D program overseas. I would not do it on a part-time basis anymore because it has been so tiring and sickening. I didn’t want to be in the hell anymore (hell me!).

So, with this determination, I gained my composure again, locked myself up, sacrificing most the weekends putting together all the puzzles and mysteries of my thesis, putting aside all the administrative fuss in the college, and casting away all the candy invitations from friends. I just wanted to make sure that I would be one of the graduates in the next 23rd Convocation Ceremony. This year. Truly, I had promised to myself that I would make it this time around, that I would not slip again.

And things looked a little brighter recently. I have proudly completed the thesis and submitted it to a second reader for final evaluation.
“Am I on the right track, Professor?” I asked my supervisor.
“Don’t worry Cekmi, you’ll complete your thesis in eight weeks’ time. And of course, you’ll graduate this August!”

Wow. My supervisor sounded so optimistic. I wish her words would come true. Thinking of this possibility made me feel so jubilated. After such a long painful time, I could now envision myself receiving the scroll.

And I could imagine my friends lining up after the convocation, proudly waiting to say the much-awaited mantra:

“Congratulations on your graduation Cekmi!”

Ladies and gentlemen,
Announcing the glorious arrival of the graduands…

End-of-Semester Examination
Semester 2, 2006/2007

Subject: Certificate English 1
Code: CEL1141

Section 1
Paragraph Writing
(20 marks)

Instruction to students:

Write a paragraph of about 150 words on a) or b) below. Your paragraph SHOULD NOT EXCEED the 150-word limit. Anything above 150 words will not be considered for marking. Write your paragraph in the space provided.

a) A Famous Person I Wish to Meet

OR

b) An Island I want to Visit


A Famous Person I Wish to Meet

A famous person I wish to Meet is my lecturer, I called his name is “Cik Mi”. He is my English lecturer. He is a Famous Person in My college. I have Three reason why I wish to meet him. first of three reason is caring. He is caring. for example When I did’t come to his class, he meet me and tell what is my problems, asks and gives some advice how to settle them. Secondly, he is Responsibility, such as When I don’t understand about one topics or question, he always gives me the introduction how to understand and finish the work. And Lastly, he is funny. for enstance, When the class feel boring, he can make jokes, gives “teka-teki”, singing, dancing, and others how to make a funny class. When the class feel funny We can studying with happy. As conslution, I want to says “Thank you very much” for my lecturer. Because he always gives advice, reminds me, thanks for everything. You is best lecturer and forgive me, if i make u angry or anything what did’t you like. May God bless you. Take care and Respect!

_________________________________________


p/s I did not mark this writing. One of my colleagues did. The student got 16 out of 20 marks.

My dear soul mate,

Do you still remember the many beautiful things we shared?

The intimacy (we were spiritually close that people mechanically took us as lovers)

The care (you gave me a wonderful Whitney Houston's 'You Were Loved' card)

The silliness (the cinema was nearly on fire before we watched 'Anastasia')

The oddity (we studied in a park only the lovesick couples would hang out)

The enthusiasm (we were crazy for Amy Tan's idiosyncrasies)

The passion (we watched movies consecutively at the same cinema on the same day)

The respect (you don't mind my budu taste for Siti Nurhaliza)

The pettiness (we listened to Disney's soundtracks babyishly)

The resemblance (we both wanted to be perfect when dubbing Celine Dion songs)

The happiness (we listened to hopelessly romantic songs while climbing the Cameron Highland)

The willingness (you agreed to further our master studies together)

The forgiveness (you forgave me when I deferred the studies we were supposed to take)

The support (you SMSed me endlessly to get me going to a new sanctuary)

The togetherness (we spent hours at Burger King's drinking a glass of coke and chatting childishly)

The miracle (we speak the language only the Grobanites would fully comprehend)

The confidentiality (we both faithfully keep each others' love tales)

The determination (we learned how to turn our own bitter love stories into a sweet coffee)

The inspiration (You bloggised me and brought me into a wildly enchanting paradise)

The connection (we listen to what we don't say and we feel the things between us rather oddly)

The sadness (we were sad at times only the two of us only knew that we were)

The thoughtfulness (we took a different path in life but we took a little of each other everywhere)

The hope (we keep hoping to be finally together in an unfounded place)

These 22 colouful abstract nouns are my definition of a true soul mate. Do they fit yours?